The Bleach Show!
by animefreak469
Summary: Ask the Bleach Characters questions and 1 dare!
1. Chapter 1

The Bleach Show!

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, but I wish I owned Hanatarou…

Ichigo: creepy….

Me: shut up gay lard!

Ichigo: I'M NOT GAY!!!!

Me: anyway, ignoring him…

Ichigo: HEY!!!

Me: ANYWAY!!! (gives Ichigo an angry glare) on this show, you can ask all the bleach characters any question…

Ichigo: WHAT!!! ANY QUESTION!!!

Me: YOU KNOW WHAT ICHIGO FOR INTERUPTING ME AGAIN THEY CAN ALSO ASK 1 DARE TOO!!!

Ichigo: WHAT!!!

Me: ok, so know it's time for you people to get your lazy hands on the keyboard and START TYPING SOME QUESTIONS AND DARES!!! Have a nice day!


	2. Chapter 2

The Bleach Show

Me: HI! Welcome to the Bleach show!

Rukia: AHHHHHHHH! I CAN'T BELIVE I GOT TRICKED THAT ESAILLY!!!

Me: all I had to do was say "sign this form and get a free Chappy the bunny T-shirt"

Of course, I had to use a different method for each person…

Kon: HEY YOU!!! WHERE ARE THOSE PICTURES YOU PROMISED ME OF NEE-SAMA NAKE- oh…nee-sama…

Rukia: KON!!!!! (Starts beating up Kon)

Me: ok then…let's start with the questions and dares…

All except author: oh no…

Me: oh yes… (Evil grin appears on face) here's **Sakaure Savo**

**Oh...  
I dare Ichigo to...Use Toushirou as a plushie!**

Ichigo/Toushirou: WHAT!!!

Me: or you can choose the other option… DEATH!!! MWAHAHAHA!!!

Ichigo/Toushirou: (nervous) fine we'll do the dare!

(Ichigo starts to hug Toushirou so hard, he faints)

Me: HAHAHAHAHA!!!! SHORTY FAINTED!!!!

(Paramedics revive Toushirou)

Toushirou: One day I'll kill you animefreak469….

Me: well, until that day come, here's **Dalton Chimizuki**

**BUAHAHAHAHAHAH! ICHIGO YOU MUST JUMP OFF A CLIFF AND SAY I'M AN EMO SASUKE**!

Ichigo: WON'T I DIE?!?!?!

Me: I'll prepare your funeral…so have a great time!

Ichigo: damn you…

(30 minutes later…)

Ichigo: (jumping off a cliff) I'M AN EMO SASUKEEEEEEE!!!! (Falls into ocean)

Me: OH DARNIT!!!! I FORGOT THERE'S AN OCEAN ON THE BOTTOM OF THAT CLIFF!! Man, and I wanted Ichigo to die…oh well…

Ichigo: (shivering in a towel) I-I-I h-hate y-y-you….

Me: dido…

**AND I HAVE SOME QUESTION'S**!

Ichigo: this can only end badly…

**ICHIGO ARE YOU AN EMO/GAY?**

Ichigo: OF CORSE NOT!!!

Me: then how come I have pictures of you at the annual emo convention?

Ichigo: well…

Me: and how come I ALSO HVE PICTURES DOING IT WITH RENJI?!?!?!

Ichigo: that was…

Me: and how come I have pictures of you DOING IT WITH RENJI AT THE EMO CONVENTION?!?!?!

Ichigo: SHUT UP!!!!

Me: HAHAHAHA!!! GOT YOU!!!

Ichigo: die…

**RUKIA! ARE YOU ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO HATE A HOLES!?**

Rukia: OF CORSE THAT'S WHY I HATE ICHIGO!!!!!

Me: OH!!! ICHIGO YOU JUST GOT OWNED!!!

Ichigo: SHUT UP!!!

Me: well, that's all we have time for today, but please remember there are other people here too! Like Oriheme and Uryuu!

Uryuu: PLEASE DON'T SEND ME ANY QUESTIONS!!!!

Me: ESPECIALLY URYUU!!!!

Uryuu: I hate you…

Me: (smiling) I hate you too!


	3. Chapter 3

The Bleach Show

Me: HI PEOPLES!!!! ANDF WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!! WOOHOO!!!!

Ichigo: more torture…

Me: but of course! Oh, and Uryuu, you have tons of dares and questions!!!!

Uryuu: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Me: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! Here we go! Let's start out with **Dalton Chimizuki**

Ichigo: NOT THAT CRAZY GIRL AGAIN!!!

Me: YES!!!! BE SURE TO TORTURE ICHIGO AGAIN!!!!

Ichigo: damn you…

**Hi sorry about last time i was hyper eheheheheh...(does sweat drop)**

Ichigo: obviously…

Me: SHUT UP!!!

**well i  
have a dare for kon!**

Me: oh god…

**he has to stare at a naked picture of rukia and try to  
resist picking it up and wishing she were naked!!**

Me: (thinking) HEHEHE!!! I GET TO SEE KON BEATEN UP BY RUKIA AGAIN!!!!(Talking) here Kon! (Hands Kon naked picture of Rukia)

Kon: must…resist…pervy…instincts…

Rukia: KON!!! IS THAT A PICTURE OF ME NAKED!!!!

Kon: uh-oh…

Rukia: KON!!!!!!(Starts beating up Kon)

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(Falls over from laughing)

(After author's laugh attack…)

Me: ok…ok…heres (snicker) the next (snicker) question…

**is uryuu the quincy guy? **

Uryuu: YES I AM THE QUINCY GUY DAMN IT!!!!

**if  
he is i wan't him to fight ichigo! but uryuu get's super power pills!!**

Uryuu: sweet…

Ichigo: oh-no

Me: here uryuu! (Hands Uryuu super power pills)

DANANANANADANANANA!

Me: Oh god…a theme song…

URYUU!!! Uryuu… FIGTING HOLLOWS EVERYWHERE! WHOS THAT CRAZY GUY UP THERE IT'S URYUU!!! Uryuu… KILLING SOUL REAPERS DAY AND NIGHT IT'S A SCARRY BUT FUNNY SIGHT IT'S URYUU!!! Uryuu…GO URYUU!!!!

Ichigo: THE THEME SONG IT BURNS!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (Ichigo disinigrates…)

Me: aw no battle…

(after paramedics solidify Ichigo…)

Me: n-n-no m-more t-theme s-song…

Ichigo: guys, I think she's finally snapped…

Hanatarou: Don't worry! I'll snap author-san out of it… STOP BEING CRAZY!!! (Slaps author hard)

Me: OW!!! Oh, thanks Hana…Now for the rest…

**ichigo  
you are kind of an Asshole just so you no...**

Ichigo: oh, thanks smart of you to say that to someone who has a giant sword!

Me: shut up Ichigo

Ichigo: yes mam…

**well anyways i wan't ichigo to run  
up to naruto and say "RAMEN SUCKS!!" and see what happens!**

Ichigo: ok…who's Naruto anyway?

Me: You'll see… (Evil grin appears on face)

Ichigo: (Behind Naruto) RAMEN SUCKS!!!

Naruto: (9- tailed fox starts appearing) ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ichigo: oh shit… AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: hehehe…

Ichigo: HELP ME!!!! (Naruto almost kills Ichigo, but Rukia saves him)

Ichigo: I-I-I hate you

Me: I know! (Smiles) anyway,heres **auburn-haired-sadist-XD**

**smirks I want...all of the Bleach characters...to have to eat a plate of  
Orihime's cooking! (Lame, I know, but it's all I got)**

All: ok then

Oriheme: It just happens that I just baked some cookies!

All: (Take one of Orihrme's cookies and faint except for Hana who seems to like them)

Me: hey, why didn't you faint like everyone else Hana?

Hanatarou: I think Oriheme-san's cookies are good! Why did everyone else faint?

Me: oh yeah, I forgot! I gave you a drink that protects you from poison!

(After paramedics revive everyone…)

Me: OK! Now on to questions!

**Has Toshiro and Rukia have ever realized that they are BOTH really short, and  
if so, does it make them feel any connection or closeness to one another?**

Rukia: WHAT!!! I'M SHORT!!!

Me: coughcluelesscough and now onto **Kimsa Ki-Lurria**

**Okay, I have a dare for Uryuu. It's just a random thing I came up with right  
now, I'll have questions (MUAUAWAHAHAHA!) for him later. For Uryuu to suffer  
an inhuman amount of humiliation (and pain), the dare is: slap  
Kurotsuchi-taichou across the face and then run away screaming, "QUINCY  
PRIDDE!" Oh and try to avoid dying after he does...The only reason I put him  
through such torture is because I would stalk him if he were real (in a good  
way)!! XD Sorry Uryuu-kun!**

Uryuu: NO WAY I'M SEEEING THAT MOLESTER AGAIN!!!

Me: like I said before, you can choose the other option, DEATH!!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Uryuu: ok, ok, fine

(Uryuu walks up to Mayuri…)

Mayuri: why hello there little boy…

Uryuu: QUINCY PRIDE!!!! (Slaps Mayuri)

Mayuri: HAHAHA!!! You too! Have a nice day! (Head does a 360)

Me: that guy scares me…

Ichigo: uh…guys…I got to go…

Me: oh, you mean to the EMO CONVENTION?!?!?!

Ichigo: SH-SHUT UP!!!!!(Leaves the studio)

Me: anyway, let's continue…

**Gasp I have some new questions and one dare. The dare is for whoever you  
want, of your choice, but it's to follow Ichigo to his emo convention and  
shout that he's an emo sasuke. And run when all the emos try to attack you,  
saying that they're the real "emo sasuke."**

Me: ok, YOU GO RENJI!!!

Renji: HUH?! WHY ME?!

Me: 'cause I hate you

Renji: (mumbles something about chickens, and then leaves)

(at the emo convention…)

Renji: HEY ICHIGO!!!! YOU'RE AN EMO SASUKE!!!!!

Gokudera: WHAT!!! NO I'M THE REAL EMO SASUKE!!!

Gasser: WHAT! NO I'M THE REAL EMO SASUKE!!!

Lee: NO! I'M THE REAL EMO SASUKE!!!!

(emo's start attacking Renji)

Renji: HELP ME!!! (And yet again, Rukia saves Renji)

Renji: D-d-die…

Me: oh, if I was dead, then I'd live In the soul society…

Renji: I MEAN DON'T DIE!!! DON'T DIE!!!!

Me: MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! MAYBE I WILL DIE 'CAUSE YOU TOLD ME NOT TO DIE!!!!

Renji: I hate you…

**Okay, question 1: (for Uryuu) Did you get a sex change when you were born?  
I've heard rumors...heheheh**

Uryuu: uh…no?

Me: you seem a little unsure…

Uryuu: (blushing) NO!!! I DIDN'T GET A SEX CHANGE!!!

Me:hehehe...

**. Question 2: this one's for Orihime. Why are you in love with Ichigo if it's  
so apparent that Uryuu's completely fallen for you?**

Oriheme: really, you like me Uryuu-kun?

Uryuu: (blushing) uh…UH…no…

Oriheme: OK!!!

Me: she's even more clueless then Rukia…anyway, that's all we have time for today, but I might not update for a few days 'cause I got to work on my other fic… ok bye-be!


	4. Chapter 4

The Bleach Show

Me: HI! AND WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!!

Ichigo: DAMN IT!

Me: What's he so angry about?

Rukia: oh, he can't get past level 1 on Super Mario Brothers…

Me: ok then… let's start off with **auburn-haired-sadist-XD**

**YaY! I have more dares! XD**

All: oh no…

**I...dare Ikkaku to shave off all his hair! (How many of you are thinking,  
"WTF?!"?)**

All: raise hand

Me: oh I get it now! She means the hair on your…

Ikkaku: SHUT UP!!!

Me: well, go on… (Evil gin appears)

Ikkaku: FINE!!! (Goes into bathroom with razor) OWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: Sounds like it hurt…

Ikkaku: (walks out of bathroom) Curse you…

Me: Hehehe…

**And I dare Ichigo to go up to Kenpachi, SCREAM he's finally ready for a  
reamtch, and then run like hell.**

Ichigo: WHAT?!?!

Me: or I can kill you! (Takes out a machine gun)

Ichigo: OK OK!!! (Runs up to Kenpatchi) I'M READY FO A REMATCH!!!!

Kenpatchi: prepare to DIE!!!!

Ichigo: oh shit… AHHHHHHHHH!!! (Starts running 150 MPH)

Kenpatchi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! MY REMATCH!!!!!!!!!

(Back at studio…)

Me: so, who thinks Ichigo died?

All: raise hand

Ichigo: I DIDN'T DIE!!!!

Me: DAMN IT!!!

**Oh, and I dare Renji to let Yachiru hang of the end of his ponytail for the  
ENTIRE SHOW. (I don't really like Renji. .)**

Renji: oh gee, thanks…

Me: YAY!!! I HATRE RENJI TOO!!!(Puts Yachiru on the end of Renji's ponytail)

Yachiru: hehe! It's fun playing with creepy man's ponytail!

Renji: OW! STOP CALLING ME THA- OW!

Me: HAHAHA!!! Ok, on to **Dalton Chimizuki**

**DAMNIT ICHIGO!! (cut's in half) I'M A GUY YOU PEICE A SHIT !! AND I GOT A BIG  
SWORD TOO!! (pulls out swrod bigger than ichigo's) see this? this is waht  
you'll get if you call me a girl one more time... **

Ichigo: AH!!! RUN AWAY FROM THE CRAZY GIR- I MEAN GUY! (Hides behind Rukia)

Me: ICHIGO'S A CHICKEN!!!

Ichigo: SHUT UP!!!

**anyways i dare ichigo to  
fight me!!**

Me: ok! Go fight Ichigo! (Pushes Ichigo into a room with Dalton Chimizuki) OK! WHO THIKS ICHIGO'S GOING TO LOSE!

All: Raise their hands

(1 hour later…)

Ichigo: (walks out of room in shreds, and then faints…But then paramedics revive him)

Me: Did you have fun Ichigo

Ichigo: N-n-no…

**and uryuu get's to torutre  
ichigo with the theme song!!**

Ichigo: no…NOT THE THEME SONG!!!

DANANANANADANANANANA!

Ichigo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

URYUU! Uryuu… FIGHTING HOLLOWS EVERYWHERE! WHO'S THAT CRAZY GUY UP THERE! IT'S URYUU!! Uryuu…KILLING SOUL REAPERS DAY AND NIGHT!! IT'S A SCARY BUT FUNNY SIGHT!! IT'S URYUU! Uryuu… GO URYUU!!!

Ichigo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(Ichigo disinigrates again…)

(After paramedics revive Ichigo…AGAIN!...)

ME: ok…let's move on…

**ICHIGO FUCK YOU! (gives middle finger)**

Ichigo: FUCK YOU TOO!!! (Sticks middle finger up)

Me: ICHIGO!!!

Ichigo: I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH THAT GIRL! I mean guy…

Me: oh, she's going to kill you… RIGHT AFTER I KILL YOU!!!

Ichigo: WHAT! (Author starts closing in) no…NO…NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Me: (Starts beating up Ichigo)

(After, yet again, the paramedics revive Ichigo…)

Ichigo: (Shaking) s-s-scary w-w-woman…

Me: I KNOW I AM! (Smiles)

**Uryuu you can have a new quincy bow.**

Uryuu: oh, thanks!

Me: ok, lets move on to **ellabell**

**ok ichigo do you like rukia**

Ichigo: (blushing) uh…maybe…

Me: oh, Ichigo I thought you were gay with Renji!

Ichigo: NO I'M NOT GAY! I'm bisexual…

Me: WTF?!?!? Anyway we have to go… see you next time on…

All: THE BLEACH SHOW!!!


	5. Chapter 5

The Bleach Show

Me: HI PEOPLES!!! AND WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW!!!

Ichigo: wow, 2 chapters in 1 day, you must be reeeealy bored…

Me: yes I am! Anyway let's start off with **animefreak469**

All: WTF?!?!

Ichigo: Isn't that you?

Me: oh, me and my friend Jessi use the same account…

**i have 2 dares...**

Hitsugaya: (to himself) please don't involve me…please don't involve me…

**one:i dare shorty to strip dance  
infront of Gin.**

Me: oh, shorty is what Jessi calls Hitsugaya…

Hitsugaya: DAMN IT!!!

Gin: (with that creepy smile he always has) come here Toshiro-kun!

Me: go on Toshiro! Your audience awaits!

Hitsugaya: Damn you…

(Since I am evil, I will not go through Toshiro's strip dancer experience…MWAHAHAHAHA!!!)

(After Toshiro strip dances…)

Me: So, how'd it go?

Hitsugaya: he did things to me…horrible things…

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

**And 2: i dare rukia to put kon in her bra and record his  
reactions**

Me: did I forget to mention Jessi has a sick mind…

All: YES!!!!

Rukia: (Puts Kon in bra)

(Love music starts playing)

Kon: I-I-I think I'm in love! (Hugs Rukia's boob) oh booby, please don't leave me!

Rukia: KON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(Starts beating up Kon)

Me: anyway…let's move on to **Dalton Chimizuki**

Ichigo: NOT HIM AGAIN!!!

**Rukia you get to beat the shit outta 2 people you wan't!!  
Coughichigocoughkoncough!**

Rukia: How did you know that those were the 2 I wan't to beat up…

Ichigo/Kon: oh no…AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (Rukia beats up Ichigo and Kon)

**DIE ICHIGO! (Destroys ichigo)  
I HATE YOU YA PEICE OF SHIT!! AND I HEREBY STRIP YOU OF YOUR DUTY FOR 100 DAYS!!**

Ichigo: NOOOOOOO!!!!!! NOW HOW AM I GOING TO PAY FOR ALL THOSE WHOPPERS!!!

Me: see, that's why you're fat Ichigo…

Ichigo: SHUT UP!!!

**i dare oriheme to go out with me!! (mentally  
slaps self) i'm nice to girls...BUT ICHIGO IF YOU GET A SEX CHANGE SO I'LL BE  
NICE TO YOU GOT ANOTHER THING COMING!**

Ichigo: but I already had a sex change…

Me: (Faints from shock)

(After paramedics revive author…)

Oriheme: ok, I'll go out with you

Uryuu: (clenching fists)

Me: oh, someone getting jealous Uryuu?

Uryuu: (Blushing) N-NO!

Me: Hehe!

(After Oriheme and Dalton's date…)

Me: so, how'd it go?

Oriheme: GREAT! We're going on another date next week!

Uryuu: (Clenching fists and gritting teeth)

Me: Someone's getting REALLY jealous!

**and i wan't to fight the great  
ichigo's dad!! i wan't to learn from the best not the worst!!  
Coughichigocough!**

Me: OK!!!

(Ichigo's dad and Dalton fight, but Dalton wins)

Ichigo's Dad: His skills are to great (Passes out)

Me: well I have to go, but we'll see you next time!


	6. Chapter 6

ANNONCEMENT

Me: HI PEOPLE!!! THIS IS AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT FROM ANIMEFREAK469! THE AUTHOR OF THE BLEACH SHOW!!!

Ichigo: DAMN IT!!! I WANT TO GO HOME!!! FINISHB THIS ALREADY!!

Me: (Evil glare) don't rush me Ichigo…

Ichigo: yes mam…

Me: Anyway, from now on, every week on the Bleach show, we will have a Naruto guest star!

Rukia: so what does that mean?

Me: It means that this guest star will be just like the cast; you can ask them questions and dares too! But you still ask the Bleach characters questions and dares…So don't stop sending them stuff either!

Ichigo: PLEASE STOP SENDING ME STUFF!!!

Me: oh, and send Ichigo more humiliating and violent dares…

Ichigo: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Me: ok the next guest star will be…KIBA INUZUKA!!!

Ichigo: who's he?

Me: You'll see…oh, and you get to vote on who you want to see next!! The 2 choices next time are Ino or Tenten! So start sending in more questions, dares, and votes!


	7. Chapter 7

The Bleach Show

Me: HI PEOPLES AND WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW WITH SPECIAL GUEST KIBA INUZUKA!!!!

Kiba: hi

Me: But only 1 person sent you anything Kiba…

Kiba: To me that's a good thing…

Me: well anyway THANK YOU ALL SOOOOO MUCH!!! I got so many questions and dares this chapter… THANKS!!! Anyway, let's start out with **Jessi Myiukiari**

**HI! It's me again...Jessi...ya know...the girl that was accidentally logged  
into Sara's account last time...anyway...OW...DAMN IT! IM PISSED OFF 'CAUSE MY  
BRACES HAVE BEEN SCRAPPING AT MY LIP ALL FUCKING WEEK!! SO IM TAKIN' IT OUT ON ICHIGO AND RENJI!!!**

**  
**Renji: Considering what she did to Hitsugaya last chapter, I better hide…

**YOU HAVE TO WEAR BALARINA TUTUS,AND RESITE  
THE NUT CRACKER SWEET IN FRONT OF THE MALL WEAR EVERYONE CAN SEE WHILE SAYING THAT YOUR PREATY LITTLE GAY GIRLS!**

Ichigo/Renji: WHAT!!!

Me: HAHAHA!!! GO ON BOYS…

(In front of the mall Ichigo and Renji are performing the Nutcracker suite, and the creepy thing about this is Gin started joining them)

Ichigo/Renji: GET THIS MOLESTER AWAY FROM US!!!!

Me: Wow, there are a lot of molesters in Bleach…

(After the performance…)

Ichigo: T-t-that was h-horrible…

Me: YEP! And the best part is I got it all on tape!

Ichigo/Renji: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

(Oriheme walks in…)

Me: Hey Oriheme! Where were you anyway?

Oriheme: On my date with Dalton! It was great we went on his rooftop and looked at the stars…

Uryuu: (VERY pissed off)

Me: AWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! HOW ROMANTIC!!! I just wish the guy I like would notice me… (Looks at Kiba) Anyway speaking of Dalton here he is right now!

**YAYZ!! ANOTHER DATE!! HAH!! EAT THAT URYUU!**

Uryuu: (Growls)

**Ichigo fuck you!! (Shoots Ichigo)  
AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH! Ichigo you have to go on a diet!!**

Ichigo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I NEED MY WHOPPERS!!!

Me: WELL TO BAD!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Ichigo: Damn you…

**Rukia you can have an  
upgrade in swords so now you have bankai!!**

Rukia: COOL!!! BANKAI!!! (Rukia's sword turns into an Ice monster) Now… ATTACK ICHIGO!!!!

Ichigo: WHAT!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!(Rukia almost kill Ichigo but the paramedics save him)

**Rukia's brother has to fight me!!**

Byakuya: Foolish boy I will defeat you!!

Dalton: oh really… (Dalton gets a sword that controls every soul reaper)

Byakuya: Oh shit…

Dalton: Now…ATTACK BYAKUYA!!!

Byakuya: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! (Byakuya almost dies but paramedics save him) H-h-he scares me…

Me: I KNOW!!!

**I wan't kiba to fight me and sparky my dog!! I  
wan't to see how strong i am**.

Kiba: ok…

(Kiba and Dalton fight but Dalton wins again)

Kiba: well I lost, but I kind of expected that after what he did to Byakuya…

Me: ok then let's move on to **Akado**

**Alright I dare Ichigo to French Kiss Renji**

Ichigo/Renji: WHAT?!?!?!

Me: oh please, I've seen you 2 French kiss so many times before…

(Ichigo and Renji French kiss…FOR 1 HOUR!!!)

Me: Seems like you boys really enjoyed that…

Ichigo/Renji: (Blushing) SHUT UP!!!

Me: anyway, here's **Psychotic Vampiric**

**I've got a dare for Ken-chan! I dare him to 1) lose to  
Oriheme in a battle (effectively the hardest thing he has ever done). **

Kenpachi: WHAT?!?! I WILL NEVER LOSE TO THAT WEAK GIRL!!!

Oriheme: (Angry glare) weak…

Kenpachi: uhhhhhhhhhhh…

Oriheme: WEAK!!!! KENPACHIIIIIII!!!

Kenpachi: uh-oh…RUN AWAY!!!

(But Oriheme catches up and knocks Kenpachi out)

(After Kenpachi wakes up…)

**2) Go to the nurse (Unohanna Retsu) so she can heal you...and then try to  
engage her in a naughty nurse game (Just because I know how much 11 division  
fears her)!**

Me: OOOOOOOOO!!!

Kenpachi: oh-no not her…

Me: YES HER!!! GO ON NOW!!!

Kenpachi: Damn…

Unohanna: oh, captain Kenpachi… you got beat up really bad what happened?

Kenpachi: Hey baby…

Unohanna: baby… (Unohanna's spiritual pressure becomes monster-like)

Kenpachi: uh-oh…AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!(Unohanna adds more wounds to Kenny instead of healing him…) uhhhhhhhhh…

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Now on to **Bored-Vizard**

**I dare Hanatarou to fight against Kenpachi...And he can use a pwning Bankai in  
the fight!**

Me: YAY!!! A DARE THAT MAKES HANA LOOK AWSOME!!!

Kenpachi: HA! This will be a snap…

Hanatarou: B-bankai! (Sword becomes a million rocks and boulders AND an earth monster appears)

Kenpachi: oh fuck… AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! (Kenpachi is defeated)

Me: HAHA! You lost after all Kenpachi!

Kenpachi: SHUT UP!!!

**Oh yeah, i also dare Byakuya to watch teletubies **

Me: (Snicker) OK!!! (Puts Byakuya in front of the TV)

Byakuya: Their powers… THEY ARE MAJICAL!!! I MUST FIND THE SECRET OF THEIR POWERS!!! (Tries to jump into TV but just hits head on glass) OW!!!

Me:???????? Anyway, lets move on to **Kimsa Ki-Lurria**

**My my, we all seem to be hating on Kenpachi today, don't we? Alrighty then, I  
gots a dare for him to! It's stupid but wtf. Take away Yachiru from Ken-chan  
for 48 hours and give her to whoever you hate the most (coughRenjicough),  
bribing her with whatever necessary to ride on his back like she does with  
Kenpachi. Then when the 48 hours are up, if Ken-chan lasted that long, see  
what 11th captain's reactions are! (CoughKILLRENJIcough)**

Kenpachi: Take Yachiru away…WAHHHHHHHH!!! (Starts crying like a 5 year old)

Me: OK!! (Takes Yachiru away from Kenpachi) Yachiru, if you ride on Renji's back, I'll let you suck on Ikkaku's head the next time we have the show!

Yachiru: OK!!! (Jumps on Renji's back)

Renji: he- OW!!!

(48 hours later…)

Me: ok Yachiru, you can get off of Renji's back now…

Renji: FINALLY!!! SHE'S BEEN ASKING ME FOR CAKE THE WHOLE TIME!!!

(Yachiru comes off of Kenpachi's back)

Kenpachi: YACHIRU!!! (Hugs Yachiru) oh, and Renji… (Smiles) your gonna die!

Renji: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! (Kenpachi puts Renji in critical condition, unfortunally, Renji lives and is revived by the paramedics) C-c-c-captain Kenpachi is s-s-scary…

Me: I KNOW!!! Ok then people I'm going to post this now, but don't worry if you didn't see your question, im going to start working on the next chapter right now


	8. Chapter 8

The Bleach Show

Me: HI!!! I KNOW IT'S BEEN A WHILE BUT WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!

Kiba: (Sighs)

Ichigo: Wait, why is he still here? I thought he was just a guest star?

Me: Because, he's now my co-host!

All: WHAT?!?!

Ichigo: how'd you trick him to do it?

Me: oh, I said I wouldn't give him Scooby snacks anymore…

Kiba: Damn the Scooby snacks…

Me: oh, and I've decided not to do anymore Naruto guest stars…instead I'm going to make a chapter with only Naruto characters in it…but it might not be next chapter…but still send dares and questions for them! Anyway, let's start with **Kimsa Ki-Lurria**

**Well I got two more dares, but they're for Byakuya-kun because I don't feel  
like being mean to Kenpachi anymore. Wow, that change of mood took me about  
five seconds. Anyway, here they are:  
1. Byakuya, you must read something called Observations, Chap.4 out loud over  
the intercom that announces things all over the Seireitei!**

Me:ok… go on and read it Byakuya...

Byakuya: (Starts to read Observations)

(At the end of observations…)

Renji: WHAT!!!!

Byakuya: (Twitching) Did…I…just say…I'm…IN LOVE WITH RENJI?!?!?! (Passes out)

Me: HAHA!!!

(After paramedics revive Byakuya…)

**2. Second dare is to become Kurotsuchi-taichou's shrink for an entire day.  
Remember to ask him why he's a molester! :D And you both have to participate  
with enthusiasm, or animefreak469-san will shoot you with her big scary  
machine gun. (I want one of those...-pouts-)**

Byakuya: WHAT!!!!

Me: GREAT IDEA!!! (Points machine gun at Byakuya) DO THE DARE DAMN IT!!!

Byakuya: OK OK ALRDEADY!!!

(In a Psychiatrists' office…)

Byakuya: um…so why are you a molester?

Mayuri: Well, when I saw you showering, then I knew I should devote my life to my "research"…

Byakuya: (Twitching) and what exactly IS your research?

Mayuri: Studying little boys of course!

Byakuya: (Twitches and then faints)

Mayuri: (Starts thinking dirty thoughts)

(After paramedics revive Byakuya and we are back at the studio…)

Kiba: (pats Byakuya on the shoulder) I feel bad for you man…

**And you have to THANK me after you do both of these! Nyahaha! Make sure you  
use the word "bestest" when thanking me, too. Yes I'm making you say that,  
Byaku-bo. I hope this incident will forever be emblazoned in your mind...by  
me! (More evil laughing...)**

Byakuya: (Sarcastically) Thank you…those were the bestest dares ever…

Me/Kiba: (Snicker)

**Aizen, I dare you to give the Hougyoku to YACHIRU for 24 hours and let her do whatever she wants with Las Noches...short of destroying it.**

Me: YES!!!! TAKE THAT AIZEN YOU BASTERD!!!!

Aizen: Damn… (Gives Yachiru Hougyoku)

Yachiru: YAY!!! A FORTUNE TELLING CUBE!!!! Cubei will I get a Polly pocket for Christmas? (Shakes Hougyoku and an Arrancar appers) OH!!! THIS CUBE MAKES PEOPLE THAT WILL PREDICT MY FUTURE!!!! WILL I GET A BIRTHDAY PRESENT FROM KEN-CHAN?!?! (Yachiru shakes the Hougyoku again and another arrancar appears)

(2 hours later…)

Aizen: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MY BEATIFUL LAS NOCHES!!!!!!!!!

Yachiru: (Devastating Las Noches with 1000 arrancar)

Me: Ok Yachiru time to stop…

Yachiru: AWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

Me: If you stop you can suck on Ikkaku's head!

Ikkaku: WHAT!!!

Yachiru: OK!!!! (Starts sucking on Ikkaku's head)

Me: ok here's **bleachrules1314**

**I have a dare for Ichigo and Hichigo (Hollow Ichigo)  
I want you to make out.**

Ichigo/Hichigo: WHAT!!!!!

Me: HAHA!!! Oh, and **auburn-haired-sadist-XD **said we should play the song **Breath **by **Breaking Benjamin **in the back round (Hits play on boom box)

Ichigo/Hichigo: (Start making out while breath is playing)

(1 hour later…)

Me: Wwwwwwwwwwwooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww…you guys made out for a long time…

Ichigo/Hichigo: (Blushing)

Me: Anyway, here's **lindy12**

**I have a question  
for Karin, Do you like Toshiro?**

Karin: (Blushing) N-NO!!!

Me: YOU LIKE HIM!!!

Karin: (Blushing) NO I DON'T!!!

Me: Hehehe…

**Now I'm gonna be mean to a character because  
my cat decided my bed was it's toilet and the dog decided that my floor would  
be a good place to poop. Make Ichigo drink a smoothie made with ketchup, ice,  
mustard, a hotdog, onions, strawberry ice cream, laxatives, peanuts, old bath  
water, and chocolate.**

Ichigo: EWWWWWWWWW!!!! NO WAY!!!

Me: I still have this Ichigo (Holds up machine gun)

Ichigo: OKOK!!!! (Drinks smoothie and then faints)

(After Ichigo wakes up…)

Ichigo: Th-that w-was ho-horrible…

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!Anyway, here's **ellabell**

**Ok Renji I dare you to jump out the window**

Me: YAY!!! (Pushes Renji out window)

Renji: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

(3 hours later…)

Renji: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (Hits ground)

Ichigo: HOW HIGH UP ARE WE!!!! (Looks out window and can barely see earth) HOLY SHIT!!!!

**Ichigo you have to walk around  
in your sister's cloths and I mean yuzu's [mwahahahaha**

Ichigo: WHAT!!!

Me: (Clicks machine gun)

Ichigo: OH FINE! (Puts on Yuzu's clothes) How's this?

Kiba: YOU LOOK RIDICULAS MAN!!!! (Starts breaking out laughing)

Ichigo: Can I kill him…

Me: NO!!!! (Smacks Ichigo)

Ichigo: OW!!!!

**Oh shorty you get to  
kiss everyone you want to cough Karin cough**

Hitsugaya: YES!!! A DARE I FINNALY LIKE!!! (Starts making out with Karin AND Momo)

Me: YOU SICKO!!! (Starts beating up shorty)

**Rukia make out with  
shorty [mwahahahahaha**

Rukia: EWWWWWWWW!!!!!

Hitsugaya: HEY!!!!

Me: (Pushes Rukia and shorty together so they kiss)

Rukia: COUGH!!! COUGH!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

Me: HEHEHE…

**I really don't like you shorty; last every one bet up shorty**

Hitsugaya: HEY!!!!

Everyone except Hitsugaya: (Evil grin)

Hitsugaya: oh shit…

(Eveyone starts beating up shorty)

Me: well I have to go…I'll try and update soon so I can get the rest of the questions…SEE YA!!!!


	9. Chapter 9

The Bleach Show!

Me: FISH TACOOOOSSS!!!

Ichigo: What's wrong with her?

Kiba: Shikamaru ate her crazy pills again…

Ichigo: oh…

Kiba: Well, I guess since I'm the co-host I'll take over today… here's **annabell10**

**Hitsugaya, I here by dare you to run up to Kenpachi and scream "I'm in love with Yachiru!" You also have to stay and tell him all the things you want to do with her!! Trust me when he hears this you're screwed!! Wait. Shorties are pretty fast so you can't run away! (Evil laugh)**

Hitsugaya: no…freaking…way…I'LL DIE!!!!

Me: I'M CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Points Machine gun at Hitsugaya) DO THE DARE OR I'LL KILL YA!!!!!!

Hitsugaya: (Scared) OKOKFINE!!!! (Runs up to kenpachi) I'M IN LOVE WITH YACHIRU AND I WANT TOI RAPE HER TONIGHT!!!

All: o…m…g…

Kiba: dud (pats Hitsugaya on the shoulder) you're dead…

Kenpachi: DIE HITSUGAYA!!!!!!!!!!!! (Attacks Hitsugaya)

Hitsugaya: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

(After Hitsugaya almost die's…)

Hitsugaya: T-t-the pain…

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Kiba: anyway…let's move on to **Bored-Vizard**

**Okay, Ichigo, i want you to go in a room alone with Ichimaru WITHOUT Zengetsu and beat the crap outa him...If you can**

Ichigo: I'll probably die but you guys don't care right?

All: NOPE!!!!

Ichigo: I thought so… (Goes into room with Ichimaru) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

(1 day later…)

Me: GUYS!!!! I'M NOT CRAZY ANYMORE!!!!

Kiba: how?

Me: oh, I made Shikamaru throw up my crazy pills and then I ate them!

Kiba: Are you sure you're still not crazy?

Me: (Smacks Kiba)

Kiba: ow…

Me: Anyway, it's time to take Ichigo out of the room with Ichimaru… (Opens door and find Ichimaru NAKED on top of Ichigo WHO IS ALSO NAKED!!!!)

Ichigo: h-help m-me…

All: WTF!!!!!!!!!!!! (All faint) 

(After everyone is revived…)

Ichigo: Thanks for saving me guys…oh, and also…I'm pregnant…

All: WTF!!!!!! (All faint again)

(After everyone is revived…AGAIN!!!)

Me: ok…let's move on to **Psychotic Vampiric**

**Now, who else can I torture...? I know! It's Uryuu's turn. I dare you to...STEAL KAKASHI'S ENTIRE COLLECTION OF MAKE-OUT PARADISE AND BURN IT! Then you have to willingly confess to him and, as a token of apology, present him with the smoldering remains of his dirty books.**

Uryuu: who's Kakashi?

Me: You'll see…

Uryuu: (Burns Kakashi's books)

(The next day…)

Kakashi: (Humming) (See's books gone) … WHERE ARE MY BOOKS!!!!!!

Uryuu: SORRY!!! I burned them…here (Hands Kakashi the burnt remains of his books)

Kakashi: you… I WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!(Starts beating up Uryuu)

Me: Kakashi! Look what I got! (Holds up all the make-out paradise books Uryuu burned AND a new one)

Kakashi: (Big eyes) pretty books…GIVE ME!!!GIVE ME!!!

Me: say please

Kakashi: PLEASE GIVE ME THE BOOKS!!!

Me: Ok (Hands Kakashi the books)

Kakashi: YAY!!! (Starts reading new volume of make out paradise)

Me: OK GOT TO GO…BYE-BE!!!!


	10. Chapter 10

The Bleach Show

Me: HI PEOPLES AND A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!!!

All except author: DO WE REDALLY HAVE TO WEAR THESE THINGS?!?!?!?!

Me: COMON!!! I WORE THE SANTA OUFIT!!!

All except author: OH FINE!!!! (Everyone walks out in an elf costume)

Kiba: NO WAY!!!! I AM NOT WEARING THIS!!!!!

Me: IT'S PAYBACK TIME!!! (Pulls Kiba out of changing room)

Kiba: (In a Mrs. Claus outfit) WHY DID YOU FORCE ME TO WEAR THIS?!?!?!?!

Me: BECAUSE YOU CALLED ME CRAZY LAST TIME!!!!

Kiba: You don't get over anything do you?

Me: NOPE!!! Anyway let's start off with **Dalton Chimizuki**

**Hi people I'm back!! (Shoots Ichigo with machine gun) sorry I've been a little stressed out lately...BUT I'M NOT MEAN TO GRILS!!**

Ichigo: God I hate this guy…

**Kiba you were actually pretty strong! I was afraid I was gonna lose.**

Kiba: Thanks! Akamaru and I have been training really hard lately!

**Anyway...Uryuu I dare you to kill a lot of hollows in 30 minutes**

Uryuu: OKAY!!!!

(30 minutes later…)

Me: So, how many hollows did you kill?

Uryuu: 1! I beat my old record!

Me: What was your old record?

Uryuu: 0!

Me: Couchweakcough

**Ichigo suck Carmen's balls**

Ichigo: No…fucking…way…

Me: (Takes out machine gun)

Ichigo: I'D RATHER DIE!!!!

Me: OKAY!!! (Starts to pull trigger)

Ichigo: (Scared) OKAY OKAY I'LL DO THE DARE!!!! (Goes up to cartman and starts sucking his balls) EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! (Throws up) HAPPY?!

Me: (Snicker) YES!!!! (Starts breaking out laughing)

**Renji you can have bankai and kill ICHIGO!**

Renji: I already have bankai…BUT I'LL KILL ICHIGO!!! BANKAI!!!! (Sword turns into Giant snake) DIE ICHIGO!!!

(Ichigo and Renji fight but Ichigo wins)

Me: RENJI YOU'RE SO WEAK YOU LOST TO ICHIGO!!!

Renji: SH-SHUT UP!!!

Me: Anyway, lets move on to **Senna the Vaizard**

I a few question and a dare for Gin Ichimaru! ...Why do you alway smile with your eyes closed?

Gin: Because I'm a molester…

Me: WWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!!! HE ADMITS TO IT!!!

**What do you like the most, pie or Cake?**

Gin: CAKE!!! Because Kira-kun baked me a cake one time!

Me: (Twitches)

**Rangiku or Kira?**

Gin: KIRA-KUN OF COURSE!!!

All: (Twitch)

**What was your favorite "Pedo" moment in the Bleach show and why?**

Gin: When I got to be in a room alone with Ichigo because I got to molest him!

All: (Twitch)

**And I dare you to keep your eyes open for the rest of the show!**

Gin: OKAY!!! (Opens eyes and turns cameraman to stone)

Me: HOLY KRAP!!! EVERYONE EXCEPT ICHIGO DON'T LOOK INTO GIN'S EYES!!!

Ichigo: (Looks at Gins eyes and is turned to stone)

Me: Anyway, lets move on to **SasaIsASexyDemoness**

**I dare Toshie to say that he's too sexy for his robes...cuz he is!**

Hitsugaya: I'LL SAY SOMETHING THAT'S TRUE!!!

Me: coughnarcasistcough

Hitsugaya: I'M TO SEXY FOR MY ROBES!!!

Hitsugaya fangirls: EPP!! YES YOU ARE TOSHIRO-KUN!!!

Me: HEY DIDN'T I GET RID OF YOU FANGIRLS?!?!?! Anyway, let's move on to **Kadiya**

**My dare is for Renji, using Bankai he must fight Byakuya and Urahara simultaneously and hopefully not die.**

Me: Go on Renj- AHHHH!!! LOOK OUT KIBA!!! GIN IS LOOKING YOUR WAY!!! (Pushes Kiba out of Gin's eye range)

Kiba: Thanks…

Me: You're welcome…oh, and your skirt is falling down.

Kiba: (Pulling up skirt and mumbling) Stupid Mrs. Claus outfit…

Me: Anyway, go do the dare Renji.

Hanatarou: He ran away…

Me: DAMN IT!!!!

**A dare for Yachiru, Call Ichigo "Mommy" and ask why he hasn't married Ken-chan yet.**

Yachiru: OKAYIES!!! (Walks up to Ichigo and pulls on pants leg) Mommy, why haven't you married Ken-chan yet?

Ichigo: WTF?!?!?!?!

Me: Anyway I gots to go! See you next time on- AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! LOOK OUT GIN'S LOOKING YOUR WAY!!!


	11. Chapter 11

The Bleach Show!

Me: HI PEOPLES AND WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!!

Ichigo: WHY!!!! WHY DID YOU CURSE ME GOD TO COME ON THIS SHOW!!! WWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! (Starts breaking out in tears)

Kiba: I think he's having an emotional breakdown…

Me: Yeah… Anyway I'm going to have the Naruto chapter next chapter… SO SEND THEM QUESTIONS AND DARES THIS CHAPTER!!! Anyway, let's start out with **auburn-haired-sadist-XD**

**First off, questions! But not just any questions, those horrible kinds of questions were you have to pick between two things of equal value! YaY! XD and also, you can't say, "I'd give my own life," or something like that instead!**

Me: Great! We need some hard questions!

**First off, Rukia, if you could only save Ichigo or Renji's live, who would you pick?**

Rukia: That's a hard one…well I guess Renji because 1) I've known him longer and 2) He's A LOT less annoying as Ichigo

Me: Got to agree with that…

**Kon, Orihime's breasts or Rangiku's?**

Oriheme and Rangiku: (Angry glare at Kon)

Kon: (nervous) um…NONE OF THEM BECAUE I'M NOT PREVERTED!!!!

Me: KON!!! ANSWER HONESTLY OR I'LL KILL YA!!! (Takes out machine gun)

Kon: OKAY!!! RANGIKU BECAUSE THEY'RE SLIGHTLY BIGGER!!!

Rangiku: KON!!!! (Starts beating up Kon)

**Ichigo, who's live would you save, Karin or Yuzu's?**

Ichigo: THAT'S EASY!!! YUZU BECAUSE KARINS EMO!!!!

Me: (Slaps Ichigo) ICHIGO YOU BASTERD!!! YOU'RE RACIST AGAINST EMOS!!!

Ichigo: So what?

Me: (Shoots Ichigo with machine gun)

**Happy questions time is over! Now for the dares (more like "commands" the way this show is going)!**

Ichigo: THEY ARE COMMANDS CONSIDERING WE'RE FORCED TO DO THEM!!!!

**I command Ichigo to let his hollow have full possion of his body for a pre-determined set of time! I don't care how long, so I'll leave that to animefreak to decide! However, it must be longer than five seconds! (Also, I am in no way responsible of any damage Ichigo receives by his hollows hands, nor if Ichigo fails to regain control over his body)**

Me: YAY!!! ONE YEAR!!!

Ichigo: WHAT!!!

Me: YOU HEARD ME!!!

Ichigo: (Hollow form starts to take over) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

(1 year later…)

Me: HI EVERYONE!!! HOW WAS YOUR YEAR!!!

Orihime: GREAT!!! Me and Dalton went on dates every week! What about the guy you like?

Uryuu: (Pissed off)

Me: He hasn't noticed me yet…maybe one day. (Looks at Kiba dreamingly and sighs) How was your year Kiba?

Kiba: Scary…

Me: What happened?

Kiba: Let's just say, I don't want to ever see a snake again…

Me: Scary… Anyway…ICHIGO!!! YOU CAN RETAKE OVER YOUR BODY!!!

(After Ichigo retakes over his body…)

Ichigo: (looking crazy) Twinkle, twinkle little star…

Kiba: I think solitary confinement screwed him up…

**And I command Tousen to do something...un-justice like!**

Me: OK TOUSEN YOU HAVE TO TOUCH EVERY GIRL IN THE SOUIL SOCIETY'S BOOBS!!!

Tousen: NEVER!!!

Me: (Clicks machine gun)

Tousen: (Touches every girl in the soul society's boobs)

(After Tousen is back in the studio)

Angry female soul reapers: (Pounding on door) GET OUT HERE TOUSEN!!! WE'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!!!

Tousen: WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T LET THEM IN!!!!

Me: (Opens studio door) (Evil gin) oops…

Tousen: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Female soul reapers attack Tousen)

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Now on to **Animefreak469**

**HI! IT'S JESSI AGAIN!!!IM GONNA MAKE ICHIGO DO SOETHING FUNNY NOW THAT IVE TOLD EVERYONE ON EARTH THAT MY BEST FRIEND ALI THINKS I BELONG IN THE COOCOO HUT!!...Ichigo...at your next emo convention you have to make out with gokudera...I asked Tamaki from ohshc to video tape it. He's good friends with my big brother, kioji, who also goes to the conventions sometimes. i never understood why Tamaki goes though**.

Me: In case you're wondering, Gokudera's this emo guy from Katekyo Hitman Reborn!

Ichigo: I CAN'T GO MAKE OUT WITH GOKUDERA!!! I'D BE CHEATING ON RENJI!!!

Me: JUST DO IT!!!!

Ichigo: OH FINE!!!! (Goes to emo convention and starts making out with Gokudera)

Tamaki: (To himself) wait till the other hosts see this…

(After Ichigo and Gokudera are done making out)

Tamaki: Here you go. (Hands me the tape of Ichigo and Gokudera making out) Oh, and I made another tape for me…is it okay if I show it to a few of my friends?

Me: OF COURSE!!! MAKE SURE YOU SHOW IT TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!

Tamaki: YES MAM!!! (Leaves studio)

Kiba: So, how was the kissing Ichigo?

Ichigo: (Blushes)

Me: Hehe…Anyway, lets move on to **Rukia42gami**

**I dare Ichigo confess his feeling and kiss Rukia for 5...no25 minute in front of byakuya! Ahahaa!**

Me: (sobs) POOR RENJI!!! (Pats Renji on the shoulder) Ichigo's been cheating on you a lot recently, huh Renji…

Renji: (Blushing) SH-SHUT UP!!!

Me: Anyway, go on Ichigo!

Ichigo: (Blushing) Ru-Rukia…I-I love you! (Starts making out with Rukia)

Byakuya: FINNALY!!! THANK GOD YOU FOUND A BOYFRIEND RUKIA!!!

(25 minutes later…)

Me: Looks like you two had a fun time…

Ichigo/Rukia: (Blushes)

Me; Anyway, I GOTS TO GO!!! SEE YOU NEXT TIME!!! BYE-BE!!!


	12. ANNOUNCEMENT!

IMPORTANT ANNONCMENT!!!

(News music starts playing)

Rukia: This just in, it seems that is being gay

Ichigo: That's right Rukia, it seems fanfiction won't let popular fanfiction writer animefreak469 (Picture of me appears behind screen) SEE THE FUCKIEN REVIEWS!!!!

Me: WHAT ARE YOU 2 DOING?!?!?! AND WHERE DID YOU GET ALL THIS NEWS STUFF?!?!?!?! AND HOW MUCH DID THIS ALL COST!?!?!

Ichigo/Rukia: Uh-oh...(Run away at 150 mph)

Me: I'LL GET YOU 2!!!! Anyway, I'm sorry, I'm going to have to delay the next chapter until fanfiction stops being gay and I can see the reviews…again I'm RRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY SORRY!!! Oh, and also I'm not going to do repeated questions for the Naruto chapter…and even if I like the couple, I'm not doing any couple dares for the Naruto chapter too…I'M SORRY!!! But you can still ask couple questions. OK THEN!!! I'LL TRY TO UPDATE AS SOON AS I CAN!!! BYE-BE!!!


	13. Chapter 12

Me: HI AND WELCOMEZ BACKM TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!!!THE NARUTO SPECIAL!!!!SINCE KIBA HAS TO DO THE DARES THIS TIME,I HAVE A NEW CO-HOST!!!

Kiba: Oh really, who?

Jessi: (Walking out of bathroom) YOU REALLY NEED SOME AIR FRESIONER IN THEIR!!!!

Kiba: NOOOOOOOOOO!!! NOT HER!!!

Jessi: Hey, I didn't do anything to you…

Kiba: YEAH BUT YOU DID A LOT OF HORRIBLE THINGS TO OTHER PEOPLE!!!!

Jessi: True…very true…

Anyway, lets start off with **Psychotic Vampiric**

**I have a question for Naruto...How in the blue Hell do you not notice Hinata's affection? It's as plain as the pencil'd whiskers on your face.**

Naruto: OF COURSE I NOTICED HINATAS'S AFFECTION!!!!

All: YOU DID?!?!?!?!

Naruto: Of course I noticed Hinata's affection…toward puppies!!!

Me: (Slaps head) coughbakacough

Jessi: NARUTO NO BAKA!!!!

Naruto: YEAH!!!! YOU JUST SAID I'M NOT A BAKA!!!

Me/Jessi: NARUTO NO BAKA MEANS NARUTO IS A BAKA!!!!

**Now a dare for Jiraya. Part one: take lots and lots of nude/dirty pictures of Tsunade.**

Jiraya: OH YEAH!!!!! (Takes nude pictures of Tsunade secretly)

**Now the unpleasant part...you have to give them to her as a birthday present and NOT run away (take it like a man).**

Jiraya: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!? I'LL DIE!!!!!!

Jessi: REALLY?!?!?! YOUR GONNA DIE!?!?!?!LETS GET HIM READY!!!

Jiraya: (Being dragged away by security guards) WHAT?!?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Jessi: SORRY!!! Perverts are funny and all, but they're also very disturbing…

(At Tsunade's birthday party…)

Jiraya: Uh…h-happy b-birthday tsu-Tsunade… (Hands Tsunade present)

Tsunade: AWWWWW!!!! HOW THOUTFUL!!!! (Opens present) (Looking scary) Jiraya…are these pictures of me naked…

Jiraya: Uh-oh…

Tsunade: JIRAYA!!!!!!!!! (Starts beating up Jiraya)

Me: Ok, here's **Bored-Vizard**

**I dare Ichimaru fight against Orochimaru**

Ichimaru: Sounds pleasant…

Orochimaru: VERY pleasant… (Enters room with Ichimaru)

(3 hours later…)

Me: They've been fighting for a long time…

Jessi: And I don't hear them killing each other…

Me: What do you hear?

Jessi: Moaning…

Me: Maybe it's the moaning of pain, go check

Jessi: (Opens door) O…M…F…G… (Throws up)

Me: What's wrong?

Jessi: (Twitching) that moaning…it was sexual moaning…

Me: (Twitching) ew…

**Naruto and Ichigo must fight each other, Naruto must be using his seal and Ichigo his Vizard powers and Bankai**

Me: SURE!!! Even though it's obvious who will win…( Puts Ichigo and Naruto in the same room…)

(1 second later)

Naruto: (Coming out off the room) ALL DONE!!! BELIVE IT!!!!

Me: DAMN THE AMERICAN DUBBING!!!

Jessi: Where's the fat-ass soul reaper? (Goes into room) Guys…We're going to have to hold a funeral…

Ichigo: (Comes back to life) for who?

Me: HOW ARE YOU ALIVE!!!!!

Ichigo: I'm an anime character, I can't die…

Me: Damn…I was hoping you were dead…

**I dare Neji to punch himself**

Jessi: Hey, while your punching yourself, you have to say I don't believe in destiny and I'm an idiot

Neji: NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!

Me: (Points machine gun at Neji) Or would you like to choose THIS option?

Neji: OKAY, OKAY!!!! (While punching himself) I DON'T BELIVE IN DESTINY AND I'M AN IDIOT!!!

Me/Jessi: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

**...and I dare Sasuke to open up his seal AND to jump off a cliff**

Sasuke: I know I'll get killed if I don't do it, so I'll just get it over with…

Jessi: AWWWWW!!!! I WANTED TO TEST OUT MY NEW WEAPON!!! (Points at cannon with torpedo in it)

Sasuke: (Opening up seal) OWWWWW!!! THE PAIN!!!! IT FEELS SO…SO…SO GOOD!!!!

Me/Jessi: (Slaps head)

Sasuke: TIME TO JUMP OFF THE CLIFF!!!! (Starts to jump off cliff) YAY!!!! I'M GOING TO FEEL PAIN!!!!

Me: (Sighs) anyway, let's move on to **my finger**

Ichigo: WHAT KINDF OF NAME IS THAT!!!

Me: SHUT UP ICHIGO!!!

Ichigo: Yes mam…

Jessi: (Points cannon with torpedo at Ichigo)

Ichigo: What's this for?

Jessi: Nothing, I just want to point my cannon at you…

**I dare Kiba to leave Akamaru alone in the Forest of Death for a whole day; he can't take pills or stuff**

Me: AWWWWWW!!!! POOR AKAMARU!!!!!!

Jessi: I FEEL SO SORRY FOR HIM!!!! I MEAN, HE'S A LOT BETTEER THEN MY MUTS!!! (Points to Jessi's dogs)

Kiba: I WILL NEVER DO IT!!Q!

Me: SORRY KIBA!!!! BUT YOU HAVE TO DO IT!!!!

Me: I can not force Kiba to do it…

Kiba: YES!!!

Me: Here Jessi (hands Jessi machine gun) Your going to have to force him to do it while I cry in the other room (Walks out of studio)

Jessi: Ok …

(After author is out of studio…)

Jessi: BUT I'M NOT USING THIS PIECE OF SHIT!!!! (Throws machine gun behind back and it hits Ichigo)

Ichigo: (Passes out)

Jessi: (Takes out cannon that shoots torpedoes) (Evil grin) Now Kiba, you don't want this hitting you, do you?

Kiba: THEN GO RIGHT AHEAD AND SHOOT ME!!!

Jessi: DAMN IT!!!! I CAN'T!!!

Kiba: Why?

Jessi: cause animefreak would kill me...listen just do it

Kiba: Why?

Jessi: I said I wouldn't kill you, I never said I wouldn't break every bone in your body…

Kiba: Oh fine…as long as I get to choose where I put him…

Jessi: Fine, but it has to be in the forest of death…

(1 day later…)

Kiba: HEY GUYS!!! (Holding Akamaru whose completely unharmed)

Me: HOW IS AKAMARU COMPLETELY UNHARMED?!?!?!

Kiba: Oh, I know a wolf pack that took care of him…

Me: cool…anyway, I want to post this now, so the Naruto special will continue next chapter…

Me/Jessi: BYE-BE!!!!!!


	14. Chapter 13

Me: DAMN IT JESSI!!!!!!!

Ichigo: What's wrong?

Me: JESSI WON'T PICK UP HER DAMN PHONE SO I CAN TELL HER TO GET HER LAZY ASS OVER HERE!!!!!!

Kiba: (Walks into studio) Hey guys, sorry I'm la-

Me: (Punches Kiba)

Kiba: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?

Me: YOU BECAME EVIL!!!!!!

Kiba: WHAT?!?!

Me: LATER IN SHIPPUDEN YOU BECOME EVIL!!!!!

Kiba: I do?

Me: YES!!!! AND YOU START DATING TENTEN!!!!!

Kiba: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! I'VE NEVER EVEN TALKED TO TENTEN BEFORE!!!!

Me: YEAH!!!!YOU SHOULD END UP WITH SOMEONE LIKE HINATA!!! Or me…

Kiba: What did you just say?

Me: Nothing…

Kiba: Anyway, where's Jessi?

Me: SHE WON'T PICK UP HER DAMN PHONE!!!!

Kiba: (Happy) DOES THAT MEEN NO CO-HOST!!!!

Me: NOPE!!!! I STOLE KANKURO'S PUPPET AND HE'S GOING TO BE THE CO-HOST!!!!

Kankuro: GIVE ME MY PUPPET BACK!!!

Me: NO!!!!!! Anyway, were starting off with a very good friend of ours today…(Evil grin)

All: Oh no…You don't mean…

Me: YEP!!!HERE'S **Dalton Chimizuki**

**MWUAHAHAHAHAH! I'M BACK AND MORE BAD ASS THAN EVA!!**

All: Oh god no…

**Jiriya look at this picture of Rukia and not get a nose bleed, if you do Rukia get's to kick your ass!!**

Jiraya: Must…resist…pervy…instincts…

Rukia: JIRAYA!!!!!!!!(Starts beating up Jiraya)

Me: I swear he's related to Kon…Isn't that right crow?

Crow: (Nods head)

**Naruto I dare you to try and beat me when I'm at demon mode (MUAHAHAHAAHH!) sorry I had something in my throat**

Naruto have to beat him to be the next Hokage! Believe it!

Me: Again I say DAMN THE AMERICAN DUBBING!!!!!

(Dalton and Naruto fight and they actually tie…)

Me: Wow Naruto, I didn't know you were that strong!

Naruto: (Takes off Naruto coustume)

Me: Britney Spears?

Britney: (Holding an empty beer bottle) DAMN ALL OF YOU!!!!(Breaks a vase) DADDY!!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU BUY ME A PONY?!?!?! (Lifts up Ikkaku)

Ikkaku: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! PUT ME DOWN!!!

Britney: IT'S TIME TO FUCK JORDAN!!!!

Ikkaku: JORDAN?!?!?!

Britney: (Bashes wall) LETS GO HAVE SEX JORDAN!!!!

Ikkaku: HELP ME!!!!!

Me: (Twitching) was that just Britney Spears…

Uryuu: (Twitching) and did she just kidnap Ikkaku?

All:??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

**GRANDMA TSUNADE! I'm glad you is meh Grandma!! (Hugs chibi style)**

Tsunade: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!? I'M NOT YOUR GRANDMA!!!!!

Me: QUIT IT!!!! (Sniffles) YOU'RE RUINING THE BEAUTIFUL MOMENT!!!!

Tsunade:?????????????????????????

**And Oriheme? I LOVE YOU! (Romantically kisses)**

Oriheme: Oh Dalton, these 1 ½ years we've spent together have been great…

Uryuu: (Growls)

Oriheme: What's wrong Uryuu-kun?

Uryuu: (Blushing) NOTHING!!!! NOTHING AT ALL!!!

Me: Hehe…Anyway, let's move on to **Senna the Vaizard**

**YAY! A NARUTO CHAPTER! **

I dare Kakashi to reveal his face AND stay like that for the whole show! 

Kakashi: Here goes my fangirls… (Takes off mask)

Me: HOLY SHIT!!!! So THAT'S why you called him an ugly mofo in Naruto abridged eh Iruka

Iruka: Yeah…

Me: I mean what's all that?!

Ichigo: AND THAT!!!!

Shikamaru: AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!!!!

Sakura: Kakashi-sensei, why do you have a picture of me naked taped on your face?

Kakashi: uh…

**My last dare is for Jiraya, he must read at least ONE Yaoi fic about him completely, if he try to run away or not read, you have a Bazooka right? ...If not, here mine!**

Me: Go on Jiraya…(Evil grin)

Jiraya: Uh-oh…

(After Jiraya reads a Yaoi fic…)

Jiraya: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! IT BURNS!!! HOW CAN I BE IN LOVE WITH KAKASHI!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, here's **auburn-haired-sadist-XD**

**Uh, wow. A year. O.o Not exactly what I expected, but it is longer than 5 minutes, so I can't complain. ;-)**

Ichigo: It was absolute torture…

**I have a question, but it's not for any anime characters. I was wondering why the host and a few (scratch that), MOST, of the reviewers on here hate Ichigo so much. Why do you?**

Me: Because he's an ugly, annoying, emo fagot…

Ichigo: Oh jee, THANKS!!! (Starts breaking out in tears and being emo)

**Hmm, Naruto dares...let's see...well, first off, I dare Sasuke to let the "h-e double hockysticks" beat out of him by Naruto, Kiba, Shikamaru, Neji, Chouji, Rock Lee...basically, all of the other younger teams in the Leaf Village. (Let all of your anger at Sasuke for betraying the village comes out now, boys!) Why? Because, I'm a Sasuke hater. ;-) **

Me: HEY!!! ME TOO!!!!! GO BEAT UP SASUKE BOYS!!!!

(All boMe: HEY!!! ME TOO!!!!! GO BEAT UP SASUKE BOYS!!!!

(All boys start closing in)

Sasuke: no…NO…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

(After the boys beat up Sasuke)

Me: So, how was it?

Sasuke: They made me do the worst thing possible…

Me: What?

Sasuke: They made me make out with Sakura…(Throws up)

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Anyway, I got to go…but don't send in any more Naruto dares! Last chapter was the deadline! SORRY!!! I forgot to mention it! Anyway, BYE-BE!!!!!


	15. Chapter 14

Me: HI PEOPLES!!!! AND WELCOME BACK TO THE EXTRA LONG SUPER ADDITION OF THE BLEACH SHOW!!!!!! First, I would ton apologize to all my fans for not updating in forever…and being way behind on the questions…but hey, that's what happens when your in gifted and have A MILLION POUNDS OF HOMEWORK FOR MISSING 1 DAY!!!!! AND, YOU HAVE 5 PROJECTS!!!! God I hate my school…

Jessi: And you were being lazy…

Me: And I was being lazy…

Jessi: Oh and I have something to say!

Me: YOU FINALLY GOT OVER BEING EMO?!?!?!?!?!

Jessi: (Gives author an angry glare) No… I'M OVER KILLUA AND NOW LOVE SHORTY!!!!

Me: (Praying over a tombstone) Good bye shorty (Sniffles). I'll miss you…

Hitsugaya: WTF THAT'S NOT EVEN A TOMBSTONE!!!! IT'S A BOLDER!!!!

Me: Anyway…Let's start off with **Jessi Myiukiari **(cough)Jessi(cough)

**heheheh...(evil smirk) number one...naruto...no ramen for one year(evil laugh)**

Naruto: No…More…Ramen…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (Explodes)

Me:???????????????????

**and 2...sasuke...you must be happy, and perky and girly...for 1 no 2 years...just because i hate you.**

Sasuke: BUT IF I STOP BEING EMO I'LL DIE!!!!!!

Me: Now you MUST stop being emo… OR I'LL KILL YA RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!(Takes out chainsaw)

Jessi: Nice chainsaw Sara, where'd ya get it?

Me: Weapons R us, where else?

**Shikamaru, i dare you to go to orochimaru's castle without taking your crazy pills so that you're crazy, and dance around his castle.  
and then Konahmaru has to eat shika's crazy pills...**

Me: (Takes away Shika's crazy pills) NOW GO TO OROCHIMARU'S CASTLE!!!!

Shika: (Goes to Orochimaru's palace)

(At Orochimaru's castle…)

Orochimaru: DAMN IT TSUNADE!!!!! TAKE YOUR EMO KID BACK!!!!!HE REFUSES TO HAVE SEX WITH ME!!!!!

(Shika walks in)

Orochimaru: HEY WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!?!? AND HOW'D YOU GET PAST THE GUARDS!!!!!

Shika: (Starts dancing like that guy from 6 flags) DO-DO-DODO DO DODO!!!!

Orochimaru: HEY I LOVE THAT DANCE!!!! (Starts dancing with Shika)

(After Shika and Orochimaru dance…)

Orochimaru: That was fun!

Shika: (Still insane) yeah!!!! (Looks deeply into Orochimaru's eyes)

Orochimaru: (Looks deeply into Shika's eyes)

Orochimaru and Shika: (Start making out)

Jessi: WWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW… What happened to Konohamaru?

Konohamaru: (Being emo with Sasuke in a corner)

Me: Well, it looks like we finished all the Naruto dares so all Naruto characters can go home…EXCEPT KIBA!!!!

Kiba: WHAT!!!! Why?

Me: Because Jessi just left and you have to be the co-host again! (Smiles)

Kiba: Damn it…

Me anyway, here's **Bored-Vizard**

**I have a few dare...For all the Captains! D**

Yamamoto must yell "I'M A SENILE OLD MAN!" out loud as he pick his nose

Yamamaoto: But that's not something a captain does!

Me: I know…THAT'S WHY IT'S FUNNY!!!!!MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!

(At the captains meeting)

Ukitake: Do you want some candy canes Toshiro?

Toshiro: Uh…no thanks (To himself) I swear he's a child molester…

Yamamoto: Settle down everyone!

All: (quiet)

Yamamoto: Thank you… I have some very important news…

Soi Fon: Yoruichi's coming! (Fangirl sparkles)

Yamamoto: Uh…no… I'M A SENILE OLD MAN!!!!! (Starts picking nose)

All captains except Yamamoto????????????????????????????

Me: THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!!!!MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

**Soi Fon must admit she love Yoruichi**

Soi Fon: Well everyone already knows but Ok…I'M IN LOVE WITH YORUICHI!!!!!!

**Unohana and Kenpachi must kiss each other**

Unohana and Kenpachi: HELL NO!!!!!!

Me: You already know what will happen if ya don't! (Smiles)

U and K: OH FINE!!!!! (Start making out and then punch each other) HAPPY!?!?

Me: Whatever…

**Byakuya must do the Chicken dance AND sing it**

Byakuya: MY DREAM COME TRUE!!!!! (Starts doing the chicken dance) I DON'T WANT TO BE A CHICKEN! I DON'T WANT TO BE A DUCK! SO KISS MY BUT! (Slaps but 4 times)

Toshiro: These captain meetings just get weirder and weirder…

**Shunsui must throw a cup of scotch at Yamamoto's face and say the drink was too weak**

Shunsui: But I don't wanna…

Me: WELL TO BAD!!!!!! (Forces Shunsui to do the dare)

Shunsui: (Throws scotch at Yamamoto's face, drunk) YA OLD FART!!!! HOW DARE YOU GIVE ME A WEAK …uh..hehe…

Yamamoto: (also drunk) WHAT!!!!! HOW DARE YOU DEFY ME!!!!! I AM ZUES!!!! (Sets Shunsui on fire)

Shunsui: Ow…it's hot…

**Ukitake must throw candy AND yell that he like young boys**

Ukitake: But I only love Toshiro-kun…

Toshiro: (Twitch)

Kiba: Just do it so I can go home…

Ukitake: Oh fine (Throwing candy) I LOVE LITTLE BOYS!!!! (Does a molester smile)

All: (Twitch)

**Komamura must act as a dog for the whole meeting**

Komamura: I WILL NEVER DEGRADE MYSELF TO SUCH A LEVEL!!!!

Me: AW COME ON!!!!! I'LL GIVE YOU A BONE!! (Waves bone in front of Komamura's face)

Kiba: HEY!!!!!THAT WAS MINE!!!!

Komamura: OK I'LL DO IT!!!!! (Starts chewing on bone)

Kiba: (Sob)

(At the captains meeting…)

Yamamoto: It seems SOMEONE stole my liquor (Glares at Shunsui)

Shunsui: (drunk) it wasn't me! (falls over)

Komamura: WOOF!!!

All other captains: WTF?!?!?!

Komamura: (starts chewing on bone)

(Back at the studio…)

Me: Lolz

**Kurotsushi must say "I HATE SCIENCE" and punch himself in the face (Because i hate him P)**

Kurotsushi: Why does everyone hate me! It's not my fault I'm a molester…

All: (twitch)

Kurotsushi: I HATE SCIENCE!!! 9Punches himself in the face)

Me: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Rico: STOP STEELING MY LINES!!!!

Me: (shoots Rico with a machine gun)

**...And Toshiro must ask Ukitake to give him candy AND eat it and after, steal Shunsui's drink and drink it XD**

Toshiro: (sobs) YOU GUYS ARE MEAN!!!! (starts being emo)

Me: Aw suck it up shorty…

Toshiro: IT'S CAPTAIN HITSUGAYA!!!!!

Me: (angry glare) shorty…

Toshiro: yes mam… Ukitake give me candy…

Ukitake: I HAVE A LOT IN MY ROOM! Would you like to go there?

Toshiro: NO!!!! JUST GIVE ME THE DAMN CANDY!!!!

Ukitake: (sighs) fine…(hands Toshiro candy)

Toshiro: (eats the candy) EWWWWWW!!! PEPERMINT!!!!

Ukitake: I thought you liked peppermint sweety…

All: (twitch)

Toshiro: NO I LIKE CHOCOLATE!!!! GIVE ME CHOCOLATE!!!!!!

Ukitake: ok I'll buy some later…

Toshiro: BUT I WANT IT NOW!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

Me: FINISH THE DARE ALREADY!!!

Toshiro: Fine… (drinks Shunsui's drink) Hehe I feel funny…hehe…hand…look at the little finger (touches finger)

Me: Hehe…Well I have to go, see u next time!!!


	16. Chapter 15

Me: YOLA PEOPLE! I KNOW IT'S BEEN A LON G TIME BUT WELCOME BACK TO THE BLEACH SHOW!!!

Ichigo…Yola? Wth?

Me: SHUT UP ICHIGO!!! (Shoots Ichigo with her machine gun) I've been waiting to do that for months!

Ichigo: & I've been praying you wouldn't… (Faints)

Me: Lol. Any who, again, I apologize for not updating, this time, it was pure laziness!

Renji: MAN! & MY WOUNDS JUST HEALED TOO!!!

Me: Anyway, on with the questions! Here's **Senna77**

***Hug Gin* I have a dare for you, Ichi! I want you you to fight against Aizen with your eyes open, i'm sure it won't be easy but you can do it! *Kiss Gin*  
**

Ichigo: WHY MUST YOU PEOPLE CONSTANTLY KILL ME!?!?!?

Me: 'cause it's fun (pushes Ichigo into the room with Aizen)

(10 seconds later)

(Aizen falls out defeated)

Me: WTH?!?! HOW'D YOU WIN ICHIGO?!?!

Ichigo: I don't know…

All: O.o

**...Oh yeah, Toshiro-Kun, it been a while i've been asking me but when you first meet Matsumoto, what happened? I'm sure you got whacked in her boobs in the first place!  
**

Me: Yeah, I've been wondering that too. What happened?

Toshiro: well…

_(Flashback…)_

_Toshiro: (straightening files) Okay, now it's time to meet my new vice-captain._

_KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!_

_Toshiro: Come in!_

_(Matsumoto walks in, Toshiro's jaw drops)_

_Toshiro: (sarcastically) HA HA HA! Now who sent this prostitute in here!?_

_Matsumoto: P-PROSTITUTE!!! (Matsumoto's face turns red with rage as her spiritual pressure becomes enormous) _

_Toshiro: Oh crap…_

_(Toshiro gets the shit beat out of him)_

Toshiro: Yeah…

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! (Falls over from laughing)

Toshiro: It's not funny….

All: YES IT IS!!!!

Toshiro: (looks away in embarrassment)

**...Oh and Toshiro, i have also a dare for you, i want you to...wear that bunny suit i made for you! You have to wear it in the next Captain's meeting! **

Me: (snicker) go on Toshiro…

Toshiro: WHY ME!!!!

(At the next captain's meeting…)

Yamamoto: Today… (Snicker) we will discu-(snicker) t-th (falls over laughing)

Other captains: (join in laughing.)

Toshiro: I just KNOW this is going to be on the front page of _Seireitei News_…

(Back at the studio)

Me: Hey Where's shorty?

Kiba: I think he just committed suicide (points to the window)

Me: Oh well, he'll be back. Any way, here's **lile410**

**Hm... Okay! Sadistic dare time! YAHO!  
**

**  
1) Navi (the annoying fairy from the Zelda OOT game that never shuts up so everyone wants to kill her) has to spend 48 hours with Ichigo, or at least until his head EXPLODES!  
**

Me: ok! (Throws Navi at Ichigo)

Navi: IchigogorighnoleftnoforwardbecarefulcaptainZarakiusesnobankaihessopowerfulhedoesntneeditblablablablablablablablablablablablablafishcakesblablablablablablablablablablablablablablaomgapplepieblablablablablablablablablablablabla

Ichigo: MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!! (Head explodes)

Me: Yeah, you keep enjoying her Ichigo (evil smirk)

**2) Hollow ichi, because you are so awesomely badass, you get to KILL KENPACHI ZARAKI and one other person of your choosing (coughICHIGOcough)**

Hollow Ichigo: Why do I have to kill Zaraki…?

Me: 'CAUSE HE'S ANNOYING, NOW KILL HIM!!!

Zaraki: HAH! I'M NOT SCARED OF YOU!!!

Hollow Ichigo: Oh really… (Takes out zanpactou and gives off an enormous spiritual pressure)

Zaraki: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!PLEASE I'LL DO ANYTHING!!!

Hollow Ichi: …anything? (closes in on Zaraki)

(A few hours later…)

Me: Where's Hollow Ichi, and WHY ISN'T ANYONE DEAD YET!?!?

Hollow Ichi: HEY!!! WHAT'S WITH ALL THE YELLING!!!

Me: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!?! I DON'T SEE ANY DEAD BODIES!!!! (spiritual pressure is growing out of anger)

Hollow Ichi: (smirks) Oh Ken-chan!

All: (Twitching) Ken-_chan_?!

Kenpachi: (Comes in wearing a maids outfit and is pissed) Y-yes master.

Me: (tries to hold back laugher but fails) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! (falls off of chair)

Kenpachi: (blushing) IT'S NOT FUNNY!!!

Me: YES IT IS!!!!! (continues rofl'ing but accidentally pulls machine gun trigger and kills Kenpachi) oops hehehe… (sweatblob)

Yachiru: KEN-CHAN!!!!! WAKE UP!!!! (smaks Kenpachi but then starts waving a chicken wing) look, I have chicken…

Kenpachi: (perks up) chicken? WHERE WHERE WHERE?!?!?!

Yachiru: (throws chicken) GO GET IT BOY!!!!

Kenpachi: (runs after chicken)

Hollow Ichi: (Decides to finish the dare by killing Ichigo and succeeds, unfortunately, Ichi survives because he's an anime character)

Me: WHY WON'T HE DIE!!!!!! (sighs) here's **auburn-haired-sadist-XD**

**Uh, are we allowed to kill off characters? Because if we are, my brother has a TON of dares...**

Me: yeah they'll die… but only for a second. After all they're anime characters, they NEVER die…that is of course unless I shoot them with my special machine gun hehehe… (clicks gun)

**Speaking of my older brother, he has a dare, so I'm putting it on here for him. He dares all of the characters...not to listen to the host.**

O.o Err, his idea, not mine.

Me: Oh hoho they'll listen to me won't you guys (head does a 360)

All: (Step back slowly)

Me: 'kay! Next is from **SasaIsASexyDemoness**

**Aww poor shorty! I mean Hitsu-kun! I mean Snowball!**

**Hehe you got beat up**

**Aww don't worry this dare will make you feel much better!**

**-evil grin- Throw Momo out the window!!**

**Srry Hinamori-chan but I've never really liked you**

**Arf :)**

**BYE!**

Hitsugaya: uh… she already did that herself, but it was on a bunge- (author forces shorty to cut bungee cord) …cord. Oops.

Me: hehehe….well that's all for today folks, and I promise the next update will take shorter then a year ;) SEE YA NEXT TIME!!!


	17. No, We're Not Dead :D

Hey guys~

Just wanted to inform you that Jessi and I are surely not dead XD.

Recently our lives have become stressful from school work and like I will mention in the

Chapter we are writing right now…..hey. I'm lazy. Deal with it DX

Also I think you guys should know that my obsession with bleach ended about a

year and a half ago so that was probably the last time I watched an epi…. So I'm totally

lost! :D.

This is because of many reasons but mostly because (as you'll notice by my profile) for a

year now I've been totally and completely obsessed with this anime called Hetalia: Axis

Powers. A comedy about personified countries, (Most of which are hot bishis!). If you

haven't seen it go watch it. Now. Like seriously.

So yeah that's pretty much it but btw, Jessi and I will both be defiantly attending

Chibi-pa in September so yeah. Come say hi! I'll most likely be America and Jessi will

probably be France (Both from Hetalia). I'll tell you if anything changes~ (So far away!

DX)

Well that's all for now ciao~

Animefreak469 (Sara-san)


	18. Contest! Please Read!

Hey people!

Sara-san here with sad news…I will probably never be able to update this fic again considering I barley have any knowledge of Bleach now. So I would like to pass this wonderful fanfic onto one of you!

Yes you people, my wonderful and faithful reviewers! Who I am assured are just as sick or are possibly sicker minded then me and Jessi. So to decide who I shall pass the baton onto I am having a contest!

You must take at least 3 of the current reviews that I have not done yet (as of today 6/5/11) and write a chapter of the bleach show in them! Obviously you don't have to include me Jessi or Kiba in your chapter but if you would like us to be there we would be more then honored ^_^.

Please PM your entries to me by midnight on July 5th 2011 and I will announce the winner within the week. The winner will receive all right to this fanfic, and I will advertise it in the next chapter of my fic "The Gang leader Falls In Love" and in the next one-shot I write.

Good luck!

~animefreak469


	19. Deadline is today at midnight!

Hey people!

Just reminding you the submission deadline is today! So send those submissions in!


End file.
